If you are nervous about the dentist, read this first

Dental anxiety is common and usually earned — a bad experience, often in childhood, that nobody ever addressed. The avoidance that follows makes the eventual visit harder, which makes the anxiety worse. The way out is a first appointment where nothing is done to you.

What the first visit involves

• A conversation, sitting up, fully clothed in the ordinary sense — no instruments to begin with
• An examination only when you are ready, and stopping the moment you raise a hand
• Photographs and a scan so you can see what I am seeing, on a screen, at your pace
• A written plan, sequenced so the easiest and most reassuring work comes first

Things that genuinely help

• Morning appointments, before the day has had time to build the dread
• Agreeing a stop signal before we start, and honouring it every time
• Numbing gel before any injection, and warming the anaesthetic so it stings less
• Headphones and your own music — it is allowed, and it works
• Breaking treatment into shorter visits rather than one long one

On sedation

Sedation has a place for some people and some procedures, and it is discussed openly where it is appropriate. For most nervous patients, though, a slower first appointment and a clinician who explains before acting removes the need for it entirely.

If it has been ten years, say so when you call. It changes how we book the appointment, not how you are treated.